June 2, 2014

Oh the Joys (sarcasm) of Match.com

So I am on match.com trying to find a "match" and boy oh boy - the pickings are slim!

Here is a sample of some of the emails I have received (please read while chugging some Titos; I had to).

hi there i like to meet u we close
and if u like we talk
im mi


And how about this beauty -

hi..you.luk.biriful

And . . .

I did not want to just say hi; I feel that that is just too impersonal. I read and enjoyed your profile; you are a bright articulate accomplished beautiful woman. You know you are lovely with a great smile and wonderful eyes. We do share some common interests. I have added a candle light dinner looking into your beautiful eyes sees that smile on my bucket list. I hope I have tweaked your interest; you have my attention and interest, so what next.

Seriously? Looking into my eyes is on your bucket list. BARF!!

Lord help me!

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